Getting up early, as is normal, provides time to think.
This is more true when we are only two people at home.
Such thinking is clouded
by recent happenings of course. Only good with me is, I am normally thinking
positive and constructive. Now, do not take me to be one who is in perpetual state
of blowing his own trumpet. But it is good to do occasionally.
Today’s thoughts revolved around psychology of old age and
psychological needs of such “old” people. I wonder if I may be included in that
age group.
And as usual, I found there is a specialised branch
of study. Psychology of old age is called “Geropsychology” and the branch of
study “Gerontology”. Impressed by the findings? Then read on.
Psychology of "Aged" gets affected by:
- Failing Mental capacity,
- Failing Physical health,
- Issues related with Financial stability,
- Challenges of Emotional stability,
- Feelings of insecurity.
Whereas physical, financial and mental challenges are very
evident and can be easily understood, the emotional aspect is one which younger
ones/ care givers may not be able to pay attention to. Such feelings, mainly related to feeling of insecurity, get manifested in behaviours which are difficult to
fathom.
Commonly observed behaviour may include:
- Worrying about everything, at times not acknowledging that they, the aged, can not control the situations they are in;
- Frequently changing residence;
- Seeking information about things repeatedly;
- Sabotaging relationships for no evident reasons;
- Constantly feeling that others around are talking bad about them;
- Wondering if they offended anyone or made someone angry;
- Clinging to some one whom they consider trustworthy;
- Trying to impress people around them to ensure they are valued, but feeling like an imposter inside;
- Afraid of being left alone;
- Showing jealousy for relationship of people around, with others;
- Over-reactions to situations; etc.
Some recent instances and my responses made me wonder if I was
demonstrating any or all these behaviours, and that I am old. I do realise I am
demonstrating one behaviour (in bold) of those listed above. The knowledge of such demonstrated behaviour does help me remain emotionally stable.
This introspection leads me to conclude that need for me to be valued is
the one I should get over quickly, if I do not want to be an emotional wreck. And I
need to think about how to overcome that need.
“Sthitapragnya” is the state "Aged" should achieve. And 54th
verse of Chapter 2 of Bhagwat Geeta has suggested:
यदा संहरते चायं कूर्मोऽङ्गानीव सर्वश: |
इन्द्रियाणीन्द्रियार्थेभ्यस्तस्य प्रज्ञा प्रतिष्ठिता ||
इन्द्रियाणीन्द्रियार्थेभ्यस्तस्य प्रज्ञा प्रतिष्ठिता ||
This means:
"One who is able to withdraw the senses from their objects,
just as a tortoise withdraws its limbs into its shell, is established in divine
wisdom."
Can I be that Tortoise? Is the question.
And how can others
around me help in my reaching that state is the question for all care givers. I
do hope people around me will understand me and help me achieve that state.
And as providence wanted to provide me with simpler answer, I
received this soulful rendering by Lata Mangeshkar “आता विसव्याचे क्षण”.
The pathos rubbed in royally.
