Should I be a judge?

Thinking, as I mentioned the other day, is internalized information processing activity. Information gathered through experiences, reading and discussions.

I have been thinking about judging others’ conduct for the last two or three days. This was related to my recent experience. And I wanted wisdom to decide if I can be a judge and more specifically should I be a judge of someone else’s conduct. Since I could not afford to ask anyone, I resorted to searching for advice available in public domain using one of the AI supports.

I asked, “Can I be a judge?’ and the AI provided all details including position specifications like qualification and experience and detailed out process of recruitment and selection. I realized that my prompt was incomplete. I had to provide context, I thought.

Some one asked for help through a message and the sender was not in my contact list. And it was financial help. I could not understand who is the one who requests me by my name? And I looked for identity asking my nearest family members if they could identify. Ultimately, I could find out, but not before immediate family members knew about the request. There were suggestions and advice.

I asked the sender for some details about challenges faced by the requester. In the process it was informed that I may not tell others about the request. The requester turned out to be one who was not held in very high esteem by family members having behaved in a manner not normally expected of a responsible person, having failed to support the immediate family. I asked for some time under genuine pretext.

I was thinking about the request and evaluating the requester before deciding to help. And that led to the thought 'should I be a judge' and 'should I decide against helping?' 

I was reminded of the parable and what Jesus is quoted to have said when the woman accused of adultery was brought to him and asked, should she be stoned. Jesus had said "He who is without sin can cast the first stone" (John 8:7). 

I decided to help and having helped made it clear to the receiver that help cannot be expected perennially and that ways and means to be self-supporting should be found by the beneficiary. I did not inform anyone that I have extended help.

That was the reason for my looking for an answer to the question of should I be a judge and should I have acted otherwise? And ultimately, I looked for what wise people in the public domain would advise? 

On rephrasing the prompt leading to a question ’should I be a judge?’ AI Bot provided following response:

“That's a tricky situation! While it's understandable to consider an individual's past actions before offering help, it's essential to weigh your decision with empathy and integrity. Here are some factors to consider:

• Your relationship and responsibility: As a distant relative, you may not have a direct obligation to help.
• The nature of the request: Is it a genuine need or a recurring pattern of dependency?
• Their willingness to change: Have they made an effort to improve their situation or support their family?
• Your own capacity and resources: Can you offer help without compromising your own well-being or priorities?
• Alternative solutions: Could you connect them with other resources or support services instead?

Remember that refusing help might not necessarily teach the individual a lesson, but it could also mean missing an opportunity to make a positive impact. Consider having an open and honest conversation with the individual about your concerns and boundaries before deciding.”

I am convinced I have taken the right approach and the decision. Who am I to judge? 

I am sharing this to be of help should anyone of you face such a situation and are called upon to be judging others.

PS: The family members who know about the incident are requested not to divulge the beneficiary’s identity. I am sure they will help.